On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me… a lesbian Christmas movie called Happiest Season, streaming now on Hulu! For this very special occasion, Emily is joined by her true love Kelli to run this thing through the patented Christmas ranking scale. Results (and spoilers) to follow.
Read moreThe Bachelorette S16E7: I'm In the Feels
Kelli: Recap readers, I know you all have been through a lot with the shift from one Bachelorette to another, but don’t worry — I will NOT be replacing Susan for the rest of the season. No need to pivot. This is temporary.
Emily: Welcome, Kelli. Perhaps you can bring Susan’s team good luck.
12 Days of Christmas Movies, Day 2: The Princess Switch: Switched Again
It’s Thanksgiving today, which means it’s time to ramp up the Christmas movies. And it’s time to check in with your family and friends. I did both today by reviewing the Netflix movie The Princess Switch: Switched Again, starring Vanessa Hudgens, Vanessa Hudgens, and Vanessa Hudgens. And by inviting my dear friends Todd and Mary to join me in reviewing this movie. But how did it rate on the Christmas scale? Let’s see!
Read moreKelli’s Top Five Bob's Burgers Thanksgiving Episodes
Thanksgiving is a weird holiday. I think we can admit that at this point. Aside from the fact that the “backstory” for the holiday is essentially mythical and downright offensive, Thanksgiving is situated just after election day and right at the start of the Seasonal Affective Disorder months, elements that come together to form a perfect storm of family drama and existential dread. I would argue — and I think many people would agree with me — that the only reason Thanksgiving is still a thing is because of the food. The food can stay.
This year, when so many of us are not able to travel to see our families for Thanksgiving (a blessing in disguise?), I thought it would be fun to do what several other people on the internet have already done and put together a list of my favorite Thanksgiving episodes from the TV show that does it best. Why spend Thanksgiving with your real family when you can spend it with the Belchers? If The Simpsons has mastered the Halloween Special, Bob’s Burgers takes the Thanksgiving Special crown. So without further ado, here are my personal five favorites, ranked in descending order. Watch them on Thanksgiving while you spatchcock a turkey or make fresh cranberry sauce for one—because this is a fresh cranberry sauce house, damn it, it’s who we are!
Read more12 Days of Christmas Movies, Day 1: The Holidate
What’s that? You want more movie reviews in a series? No? Well. You’re getting it anyway. And while this is the second year I’m doing this series, it feels very different this year. The holidays just hit different during the time of Covid, don’t they? Half of the country is staying home, not seeing their families, and putting up their sad tiny Christmas trees/holiday decorations from their celebration of choice. And it’s sad and lonely. And the other half is just… going about their life. Like nothing is wrong.
Yeah, I’m bitter. And these reviews might reflect that a little bit. But you know what they say about Covid. It is what it is.
So on that cheerful note, let’s talk about The Holidate. Which is a movie.
Read moreThe Bachelorette S16E6: Stop Jibber Jabbering Your Mouth
Image: ABC
Can you spell “Grown Ass Man”? If not, no big deal! Just wear a robe and have all the confidence of a mediocre white man nicknamed Wolverine. Let’s get into it and separate the men from the Marvel characters.
Read moreHis Dark Materials S2E1: I Followed A Cat Through A Hole in the Air
With how strange 2020 has been, it’s hard to believe it’s only been a year since I was here recapping season 1 of His Dark Materials. And yet here we are, reaching the end of one hellish year, and we’re rewarded with quite the pleasant surprise. Or it was a surprise for me. This season really crept up on me. I didn’t realize it was happening until it was almost here, and yes, I am very excited it is here.
As I mentioned last time I did these recaps, please note that I’m writing from the perspective of someone who has read the books, but I will not spoil anything in the books that hasn’t yet happened in the show. If something happens differently in the show than it happens in the books, however, I may bring it up. Because I’m that person. Now let’s do this.
Read moreLate to the Game: Outer Wilds
Sometimes, I like to punish myself with very difficult video games. There’s pleasure in the frustration of dying over and over, only to eventually accomplish whatever goal the game aims for. The repetitiveness of retracing one’s steps is meditative. Rage quitting only builds excitement and determination. But none of that is supposed to happen in games about exploration and discovery. Outer Wilds, Mobius Digital’s 2019 game about space exploration at the end of the universe, advertises itself as a self-paced journey about space and new worlds.
The Bachelorette S16E5: His Face Hit My Elbow
It’s time for another episode of The Bachelorette, everyone! After the peaceful transfer of power last week, Tayshia is our new Bachelorette. And she’s ready to have a bomb summer and fall in love, in that order. So let’s start this journey. Again! We never tire of it.
Read moreThe Bachelorette S16E4: Apologize to the Group
Our own positivity about this episode is surprising, even to us. But in a post-Trump world, we’re just breathing a little easier, and maybe a sappy, over-the-top love story was just what we needed while we waited on election results this week. So yeah, we’re pretty much all in on Clare and Dale. Come at us. Let’s see how the teams did this week.
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